My Guru Ram Das Miracle

About 5 years ago I was living in Italy with my yoga teachers.  It was a huge time of personal transformation for me on many levels (living the yogic lifestyle, getting comfortable with myself as I am etc).  The transformation I want to talk about today is my relationship to miracles and faith.  I love the Yogi Bhajan quote “I don’t believe in miracles, I rely on them.” It takes a HUGE amount of faith in the Universe to trust that the miracle you need will manifest in your life at the right moment.  And that was something that while I always wanted to believe… in my deepest places….I didn’t. 

While I was living in Italy my older sister called with the exciting news that she was pregnant with her second child.  I wasn’t at all surprised by this as I had had an intuitive insight before I left that she would be having a little girl soon.  We were all excited to hear that a new soul had chosen us to be her family.  A few weeks later my sister got the results of a test, which indicated the baby may have a serious developmental condition that would effect her ability to grow and develop in a “normal” way.  This was, of course, very unsettling news. 

When I heard this news I knew right away what I needed to do.  I started chanting 11 repetitions of the Dhan Dhan Ram Das Guru Mantra every day.  I’ve heard people say that this mantra will make miracles happen.  After all it is a mantra in celebration of Guru Ram Das, the Lord of Miracles, and I felt like we needed the miracle of a healthy baby.  The first few days I chanted I was really hoping it would help….but felt it my heart that it was a lost cause.  By the 20^th day (or so) I noticed that while I was chanting I really (really!) felt that this baby would be totally healthy.  But at other times of day the fear or anxiety of the thought of the challenges this soul may face reared their ugly heads. 

Finally, by the 40^th day I realized I had completely dropped my fears.  I had connected during the meditation to the new soul and I knew, absolutely, that she would be perfect.  That she would come into our family and bring joy and that she would live out her destiny exactly as it was written.  And that, in and of itself, felt like a miracle.  That I was able to drop my fear and feel peaceful felt miraculous to me regardless of the health of this child. But Guru Ram Das wasn’t done…

Flash forward to a few months later:  I watched as my beautiful, perfectly healthy niece came into this world.  She has no signs of developmental disability and in fact is incredibly smart (This week in school she’s learning about words that rhyme…so she often comes home chanting things like “Lama, Mama.  Rhymes!”).  While I don’t lay any claim to creating the miracle of a healthy kid…I do feel that I connected to  Guru Ram Das in a very meaningful and personal way during this experience.  I feel the miraculous love of the Universe more and more each day.  And while I still, sometimes, have trouble truly believing that my miracle will come true…. I find it easier now to remember that my prayers have been answered and to rely on God, Guru and/or the Universe to keep answering them.  Sat Nam.  

What IS your name again? My Spiritual Name Introduction

Many of you have known me as Kelsey.  For a few days, months, years….or the whole 28 years I’ve been on this planet.  While I like the name given to me by my parents it is clear to me that now is the time to make a change.  10 years ago I was given a Spiritual name that is very dear to me.  From now on, I will be known as Nirmal.  Read on to find out more about this tradition: 

In the Kundalini Yoga tradition there is the opportunity to request your spiritual name.  When Yogi Bhajan (the master of Kundalini Yoga) was alive he personally meditated on each request for a spiritual name and would send you a letter with your new name.  I requested (and received) my name from Yogi Bhajan in 2002.  I remember clearly opening the envelope, standing outside in our driveway and feeling completely pleased and connected to the name. 

Even though I felt an immediate resonance with the name ‘Nirmal’ I was hesitant to use it right away.  For a while it felt to personal and sacred to share with others.  And then I was concerned that others would think it was weird or it would be confusing in my various school or work circles.  More and more over the years I have become aligned with my identity as a Teacher and Trainer of Kundalini Yoga, as taught by Yogi Bhajan.  The more I follow that path the more people call me Nirmal.  And the more I like it and crave that name to be my whole identify. 

Why would a name have such an impact on me?  For one the beautiful and sweet meaning, Nirmal can be translated in many ways.  In the letter he wrote to my Yogi Bhajan translated it as “the Flow of Harmony.”   A more literal translation (Nir= No, Mal= stain) is stainless.  I’ve also heard “immaculate.”  A spiritual, or destiny name, is both a signifier of who you are in this lifetime and a call to live your highest destiny.  While I think the idea of “flow of harmony” pretty neatly encapsulates who I am I also feel that it is something I will strive towards my whole life.    

So more and more over the years I have been called Nirmal.  It is to the point that I very much associate only with the name Nirmal.  And I am transitioning to using this name in all arenas of my life.  I would like to humbly request that you all make the effort to switch over to calling me this name.  I know there will be times you forget and I will try to gently remind you until it is just the name that rolls off your tongue when you see or think of me.

But this brings up a good point….how do you pronounce it anyway?!?  The first syllable ‘Nir’ sounds just like the word ‘Near.’  The second syllable ‘mal’ sounds like the second half of the word ‘normal.’  So, there you have it….Almost Normal, but not quite (sort of like me, wouldn’t you say?)  J

Each time you call me Nirmal you are not only making me radiantly happy you are also offering a blessing and a prayer for me that I might fulfill my destiny on this planet.  Using someone’s spiritual name is a loving act of service and I very much appreciate your kind efforts in this area!

If all of this talk of spiritual or destiny names has piqued your interest you could consider getting your own!  Before he died Yogi Bhajan trained Nirinjan Kaur in his system of numerology and meditation to select spiritual names.  I know people who have gotten their names from Nirinjan and feel a similar resonance and connection.   There are no requirements to get a spiritual name.  To learn more or request your own:  http://www.3ho.org/spiritual-names/

 If you still have questions about this tradition, pronunciation or my decision to be known as Nirmal I am more than happy to discuss with you…just let me know! 

And here are a few more lovely articles about people who’ve taken on their own spiritual names: 

http://www.karmicecology.com/body/environment/patty-kikos/change-your-name-change-your-life/

http://www.spiritvoyage.com/blog/index.php/raise-your-vibration-with-your-spiritual-name/

Walk on your path to the best YOU!

At each moment of each day we have a choice of how we’re going to live, which thoughts we’re going to think and which path we’re going to walk. If we choose to live and think the things that are indoctrinated into us by cultural expectations or limited visions of our self we will walk a path of “just getting by.” If we choose to think elevated thoughts, to see ourselves in the divine web of perfect existence and to work towards serving and helping others we will walk on the path to our highest destiny. When we work with the Ether element we are calling up our ability to live our divinely inspired lives. Ether is lighter than air, it is the element that surrounds and infuses our bodies with the spark of life. When we invoke the qualities of Ether we invoke the spark of all creation in propelling us forward towards our own divinity.

All of this is not to say that there is some perfect image of a yogi or a person that you are striving to be. I remember a time, just after I finished teacher training, when I felt all of this pressure to be a “perfect yogi.” I felt like I was letting myself (or, maybe, God?) down by not getting up before the sun and meditating each day. Like I was missing the point of being a yoga teacher if I didn’t grow my hair or take a cold shower each day. One of the most powerful lessons I learned that helped me turn that self-shaming cycle around was this: You are not here to be the best yogi. You are here to be the best YOU. Everyone’s spiritual path is different, the gifts and limitations you bring to this life are different than anyone else’s. But everyone can develop their gifts and become even more in tune with who they really came here to be. Everyone can make the choices in each moment that bring them away from shame, sadness or contraction and bring them towards destiny, fulfillment and radiance.

I’m not saying it’s easy. Choosing a new way of being, thinking and living can be tough. It requires grit. It requires the tenacity to keep at it even if you’ve failed in the past. It required surrender. And (for me, at least) it requires the grace of God/The Universe/The Infinite. The mantra Wahe Guru taps into that ecstasy of surrendering to and allowing the divine to flow through you and bless you with the grit to walk on your highest path with each and every step.

Wahe Guru!